I went out shopping for a Generation Z eater yesterday.
If you have kids in the house, you might know what that means. I don't think we have a full handle on the "Generation Z" generation yet, but I believe when it all shakes out, one of its main defining characteristics -- other than their insistence on using social media and technology that no one over the age of 25 uses -- is their habit of binging on everything.
Show-binging is the most famous one. My daughter does that. But she also "binges" on types of food. This has nothing to do with any kind of eating disorder. She simply decides she likes a certain snack food a lot, must have it, then eats it for like six months, and then never wants it again.
I was setting out to get one of those must-have snacks, when I realized I needed a few other items. I didn't have the energy to go to multiple stores, and I knew that Walmart would have everything I needed, so I dutifully drove to Walmart. So I could binge shop.
I decided to head over to the card aisle and pick up a small something, a rack pack of Allen & Ginter or Stadium Club or something else that just came out -- when, BAM, I was struck in the face by about 10 rack packs of 2016 Chrome, and beneath that about eight blasters of the same stuff.
Chrome? ... What? ... How is anybody supposed to keep up?
Didn't Topps just release Archives? Aren't people full-force into A&G? Aren't they buying Olympic cards? I've bought exactly one blaster of A&G and one of Stadium Club. It's all I've had time to buy. Who has time for something even newer?
But I couldn't ignore it.
You know me and chrome.
Yes, I know you don't care for it because it's the same cards that just came out.
Yes, I know you're not buying a pack that contains four cards.
Yes, this is the same design I disliked so much eight months ago.
But did you look at who was on the pack?
None of the above matters. I just can't ignore a pack with Kenta Maeda on it!
I momentarily considered a blaster, then smartly grabbed one 3-pack rack pack with five Pepto-Bismol parallels.
Let's see some shiny!
#54 - Dee Gordon, Marlins
Now that Gordon's off the Dodgers, I pull all of his cards.
#1 - Mike Trout, Angels
I just put a handful of Trout cards I have in top-loaders. Gotta pre-tect the investment!
#PC-18 - Corey Seager, Dodgers, Perspectives
Perspectives has apparently joined Chrome, too, and they've added Corey Seager, because, of course.
This is the card that justifies everything I did in Walmart last night, even that thing about switching self-checkout registers in mid-transaction, throwing the overseer employee into a tizzy.
#120 - Ben Zobrist, Cubs
This is a different photo than what appears on Zobrist's card in flagship. This is an actual, unphotoshopped Cubs uni, I believe.
#115 - Starling Marte, Pirates
As you can tell, the smoke is back. It's not as obvious on the chrome cards in-hand. But on the scan, Marte is pointing the way to the nearest exit. Cover your nose and proceed in an orderly manner.
#173 - Wei-Yin Chen, Marlins, prism parallel
I'm sure this card will never leave the house. Can't there be someone who's trying to complete an all-prism set?
#99 - Jose Berrios, Twins
Guy who has appeared in Bowman and Pro Debut this year. So, no idea. One of these days I will have more cards in my collection of players I don't know than players I do.
#40 - Stephen Strasburg, Nationals
#21 - Alex Gordon, Royals
#164 - Nomar Mazara, Rangers, prism refractor
Lot better than that Marlins pull.
#5 - Mashiro Tanaka, Yankees
#47 - Chris Davis, Orioles
Let's open the pinkies:
#146 - Alex Rodriguez, Yankees
Soon-to-be-Yankee instructor. I'm very happy I won't have to see A-Rod on a field anymore, but nothing would make me respect him more than ditching the Yankees, signing with the Indians and winning a World Series. Hal Steinbrenner might turn into George on the spot if that happened.
#155 - Zach Britton, Orioles
I pull a lot of Orioles.
#47 - Chris Davis, Orioles
A lot of Orioles.
#104 - Miguel Sano, Twins
Nothing to say, so I'll just add that I still smell my chrome cards.
#131 - Trayce Thompson, Dodgers
Yay! A Dodger pinkie!
That was an excellent pack. I can't tell you the last time I bought a Chrome pack and didn't pull a Giant. I don't think it's ever happened.
However, it will probably be the last 2016 Chrome pack I buy. I bought only one Chrome pack last year and I liked the design a lot more than this year. The honeycomb pinks just don't do it for me, along with all the other weird design elements.
Besides there are about four other new card products I can buy now anyway. I still don't know why Topps doesn't space these things out a little. I guess Topps is just like those Generation Z kids -- binge product releasing.