Night Owl Cards

I was at Walmart at 2 a.m. the other day. This is not out of the ordinary for me. I work nights, and sometimes the greatest part of my job is the fact that I can shop when no one else is around. This comes in handy particularly at Walmart, which appears to be inhabited by exactly 1,846 customers at every hour of every day. The shocking thing to me is not the number, but how much each customer is purchasing. Their carts are perpetually loaded, in every check-out line, every time I walk in there. Picture little old me with a few toiletries and a rack pack of cards. Now picture someone so large that driving an SUV is a necessity. And they are buying twice their weight. I hate entering Walmart between the hours of 8 a.m. and 10 p.m. (sometimes you'll get lucky and there is a little window of unimpeded shopping around 5:30 p.m. Sometimes). But a Walmart at 2 a.m. is glorious. Wide aisles devoid of screaming kids and cursing adults. No inane cell phone conversations to hear. No