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A rant about the Marlins (hey, at least it's not more Allen & Ginter)


I just got finished with a long day of summer vacation stuff and I was looking forward to playing Allen & Ginter Box Buster Bingo over at Crackin' Wax.

Unfortunately, the internet was down for like an hour and now I'm beating on the door at CW seeing if they'll let in someone over an hour late, but having no success.

So, trade post it is!!!!

It was either that or finding something interesting in my latest A&G purchases. And while I look at people who moan about A&G the same way I look at that one person who says "but I don't like chocolate," I will be nice and lay off the A&G for at least one post.

I received a stack of Dodger cards from my good man, The Cardboard Don, recently. As you know, he's a Marlins fan. He even stuck this card of Ozzie Guillen -- the current Marlins manager -- in with the Dodgers.

I like Ozzie. I've said that before. I know he says stupid stuff. I know he ticks people off. I don't care. I still like him. I like him because he isn't afraid to say what pops into his head, no matter how ridiculous. Listen, a lot of people are thinking a lot of weird and stupid stuff, and although I don't support the idea that everyone should say EVERYTHING that they think, I do support the idea that a lot of people need to stop getting so hyper about the one or two "controversial" things that may come out of someone's mouth somewhere in the country every other day, and just let things and people BE.

Don't give Ozzie any more attention than he's getting. As I've said innumerable times in regular life, if you let it bother you, it will. Focus on stuff that's important, not on what a baseball manager is saying. He's not an expert on anything but baseball.

Anyway, this comes about because I know someone who despises Guillen. But he's not a fan of one of the Marlins' rivals. He has no Cuban ancestry that I know about. Yet, he badmouths Guillen and the Marlins every chance he gets.

But that doesn't even come close to how often he badmouths this:



If you ever read about some nut job running amok on the field and blowing up the Marlins' mechanical structure that goes off every time a Marlin hits a home run, I can probably fill you in on the who.

I've never encountered so much hate for an inanimate object in my life. I have to hear him bash this thing every third day. I don't get it. I'll admit, I tolerate this structure much more than others -- I think it fits the Miami lifestyle/culture quite well. But bashing it incessantly strikes me as discriminatory and even approaching that ugly word that I won't mention here because I don't want to get the people who flip out every time Guillen says something off-kilter excited all over again.

It's a flashy, colorful, over-the-top piece of machinery featuring mechanical fish. That's all. I'm sure I could find something stupid about every baseball team in America and go on about it repeatedly. But if it ain't the Yankees and it ain't hurting anyone, it's only good for a single "hey, did you see that crazy new (fill in the blank)? That's bizarre, huh?" And then, SHUT UP ABOUT IT.

OK, that's more about the Marlins than I'll ever write in my life, but The Don wanted a long post -- he even requested it in the note he sent.

So, how'm I doing, Wicked?

Oh, right -- cards.

I received a nice, healthy stack of cards from South Florida. Unfortunately, I had a lot of them already. A couple will go to very key upgrading needs. One heads off to my new A&G frankenset quest.

But my hope of reviving "What's The Best Card in the Package?" with these cards didn't come to pass.

So here are the key cards that I didn't already know. And they are very key:


Do you know how difficult it's been for me to obtain the gold parallels for 2006 Topps Dodgers? Keep in mind, this is the set that I bought more cards of than any set besides 1989 Topps. I built up a very respectable reserve of gold parallel cards from this set. But only one Dodger. J.D. Drew. That's it.

In the ensuing years since 2006, I've created a blog and traded with hundreds of people throughout the country. I've obtained at least 100 Dodger gold parallels, if not more, in that time.

This is my second 2006 Dodger gold parallel.

I'm calling a federal investigation.


Ha, ha. Remember crazy 2010 Upper Deck? Matt Kemp apparently plays for the Los Angeles 3.14159s. Doesn't that thing on Kemp's helmet look like the Pi sign?

Any package with a Matt Kemp relic is super generous.

Even the white swatch is fantastic. Because that means it's a Dodger home jersey and I'd much rather have a scrap of that than some practice garment.


How many of you knew that there was a relic card of Wes Parker? How many of you knew that someone could find an old bat of Wes Parker's? How many of you knew who Wes Parker is?

Of course, Dodger fans know. Parker was the slick-fielding first baseman before Steve Garvey came along. Parker wasn't known for his bat, although he had a terrific 1970 season.

I was thrilled to see this card. Ideally, I'd have a relic card for every player who ever played for the Dodgers. That's an impossibility. But at least it's one card less of an impossibility.

Finally, we come to a card that was the best of everything in the envelope.

It is a card that I was convinced that no one owned except for some people over in Japan.

It was on my Nebulous 9 list longer than any other card.

Are you ready to see it?

OK.

But you've got to wait for it ...

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It's the 1996 Hideo Nomo phone card!!!!!!

Yippee!!!

It's about freaking time.

And now the post is done.

And not a single Allen & Ginter card.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

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So, Wicked, is the post long enough?

Comments

JediJeff said…
Looks like the LA Pic-a-nic Tables.
Nachos Grande said…
Bonus points for using pi in a post.
Commishbob said…
I like Ozzie, too. Too many stuffed shirts in baseball, always has been. Ozzie is different. I REALLY like that Ozzie card. I'm going to track it down.

The Marlins whirly-ma-jig thing? I don't know why it's such a big deal. People get all bent out of shape over the oddest stuff. I know some Astros fans that get sputtering mad about "Tal's Hill" at Minute Maid Park. Just chill. Enjoy baseball.

get mad over serious stuff like the unreadable 16 letter captcha code word I'm going to have to decipher to get this posted.
Mark Aubrey said…
I know, I know. Fess Parker played Daniel Boone in the last half of the 1960s.

Do I win?
madding said…
Tal's Hill and that monstrosity they have going on in Miami are not baseball. That thing is almost worse than the DH rule. Green Screen Park makes my eyes bleed.