Ranking the Santa Clauses

 

Merry Christmas, readers.

This Christmas season has rushed by, as it often does, but it seems like it found another gear this year and suddenly the cookies aren't made, the decorations are haphazard and I haven't watched a single, obligatory Christmas special.

So I think it would behoove me if I made a holiday post right now to remind me what I should be doing. Then again I write a holiday post every year, so I'll stop babbling.

This year I'm ranking the Santa Claus cards in the 2007 Topps Santa Claus set. Do you all remember that set? It seemed to come out of nowhere and I have barely paid attention to it since, mostly because it showed up when I didn't know what was going on in modern cards ("it's just Topps and Upper Deck flagship, right?")

The boxes, which originally sold for $9.99, contained 16 base cards and a Santa relic card and Santa autograph. Per usual, I don't care about the hits (they're not really hits, you guys -- I saw one video where the guy was getting the signed Santa card graded four different times. People sure do like throwing away money). I'm just rating the base cards, mostly on the past Topps design and the Santa image. Also I'm not going to pretend I know the origins of the photos/drawings, etc., but I do know some of them are pretty famous.

The only one of these cards that I own is the 1975-designed card, because it's a 1975 design.

Ho, ho, ho, let's go.

 

 

16. 1968, St. Nick, Clement Creations, #7

What's probably an old book illustration from The Night Before Christmas is bordered by one of my least favorite vintage Topps designs. Just a little too muddled for my liking. Those stockings almost look like animal carcasses.

 

 

15. 2001. Santa Claus, Industrious Elves of the North, #15

 

Each of the cards contain a "team name" for Santa, but just like 2001 Topps, there is no name on the front, just a logo. This "logo" is a sweeping, a.k.a., industrious, elf. The depiction of Santa and an elf, apparently walking on a snow-covered roof, looks suspicious to me. They seem more like looters than jolly gift-givers.

 

By the way, the measurements on the back give Santa's weight as 300 pounds. 

 

 

14. 1953, Father Christmas, Yuletide Spirits, #2

 

The back explains the origination of "Father Christmas" and says its most famous depiction is as the Ghost of Christmas Present in "A Christmas Carol". As a kid I liked that ghost because he seemed so happy, then he spooked me with that creepy boy and girl inside his cloak and I didn't like him anymore.

 

 

13. 1955 Santa Claus, Douglas Firs, #3

 

The Santa head shot and "action" shots are too similar for me. But in keeping with Topps cards from the mid-1950s, the back is more interesting than the front. The "stats" on the back list the total number of countries visited, nice children, naughty children, lumps of coal delivered, cookies eaten, etc.

 

 

 

12. 1959, St. Nicholas, Pennsylvania Dutch, #4

 

St. Nicholas was a real bishop around the year 300 in what is now part of Turkey. He had a reputation for secret gift-giving and he's the template for Santa Claus. Children in Europe still celebrate St. Nicholas by putting their shoes out so they can be filled with gifts. But that bishop's hat is not reminding me of Santa.

 

 

11. 1993, Santa Claus, Northern Lights, #14

You just don't see many images of Santa and Mrs. Claus as a couple. The back pays homage to Mrs. Claus' "behind-the-scenes" contributions, apparently she's in charge of the toy-making enterprise. The most I knew about Mrs. Claus as a kid is "Whoever heard of skinny Santa? Eat! Eat!" from the beginning of Rankin & Bass' "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer".

 

 

10. 1981, Santa Claus, Boreal Blizzards, #11

 

This card celebrates the mall Santa and the sometimes-terrified kids who sit on his lap. The background is pretty stark as if Santa is taking Christmas gift requests in his basement. I like the Santa hat replacing the baseball cap.

 

9. 1975, Kris Kringle, Polar Bears, #9

Love the red-and-sickly green of 1975 Topps. "Polar Bears" might be the most realistic team name in this set but I don't know why we couldn't give Kris a position instead of repeating the team again.

8. 1965, Santa Claus, Winter Solstices

This set really doesn't want to come up with a position for Santa. But I always like the '65 design (and am bugged when the flags aren't as large as the originals). I like the moon logo. Santa looks like John Travolta in that commercial or maybe that's me watching too much football.

 

The write-up explains how Santa's current look came to be, the result of various artists conveying their idea of Santa Claus in magazines and in advertisements.

7. Santa Claus, Arctic Sleighers, #12

Not every past Topps design is shown in this set but we couldn't have a set without the 1987 design again could we? This card shows the classic Santa that I know, I always want my Santa to wear those reading glasses for some reason. Santa looks like he's modeling here. Also, Arctic Sleighers is an awesome team name and now I want MLB to put a team in Anchorage.

 

6. 1988 , Santa Claus, Reindeer, #13

I love this illustration and card presentation so much, I almost put this at No. 1, but since it doesn't display Santa prominently, I didn't. This is the most "action-oriented" card in the set and the back focuses on the role of Santa's reindeer.

5. 1952, Santa Claus, Antlers, #1

Out of all the cards in the set, this one describes Santa as a ballplayer more than any other. Look, he's carrying a bat! The write-up recounts Santa's baseball skills and his weight here is a slim 210! Santa looks fairly young in the photo, and that short beard is throwing me off.

4. 1973, Santa Claus, North Pole Noels

I recognize this illustration, it's from Thomas Nast, who is credited for helping form our current idea of Santa Claus. He illustrated Santa Claus for Harper's Weekly in the late 1800s. I don't know what Santa is doing in that position logo.

3. 1960, Santa Claus, Holiday Tidings, #5

Three Santas on one card! Santa very jolly! Love the black-and-white "player" photo.

After reading the backs for all of these cards, there's a bunch of information repeated, but overall a pretty good job of supplying little nuggets about the history of Santa.

2. 1978, Santa Claus, Hohohos, #10

Great picture, love the perspective, love the team name. The card focuses on Santa's bell and its use in the Salvation Army campaign each year.

1. 2007, Santa Claus, Bowlfullajellies, #16

Maybe too modern for some tastes but I think it's cool how there's an up-to-date depiction of Santa on his laptop on the sleek '07 Topps design. I enjoy the red-and-green squares and Santa's smiling and his glasses. Also the team name is inspired.

 

Today -- or maybe only right now during holiday time -- this set will cost you like $90, which is almost insane to me.

All right, nobody had time to read all that, but I'll be taking a brief break for holiday festivities so it's here to view whenever you want. 

I hope everyone gets the cards they want and maybe Santa can find some coal for a few of those box breakers.

Good tidings and enjoy. Save some cookies for me.