With a bit of resignation, I return to Gint-a-Cuffs, knowing that the best is behind me.
I have no idea what it will take to win this year's competition. I just know that I don't have it.
What I do have is another hit waiting for me. That's something. And there could be some more Dodgers. There's another thing. And there could be arbitrary champions of tree-climbing or reptile-wrestling or something. Does the Guinness Book of World Records have a say on who gets in this set each year? If so, where's the most tattooed woman? That would make an interesting card.
OK, babbling is over. Instead, time for ridiculous commentary on the cards contained herewithin this box. It's Packs 16 through 18.
PACK 16
1. #38 - Tiago Della Vega (0 points). The fastest guitar player in the world. This set is filled with freaks, I tell ya.
2. #292 - Chris Pettit (0 points)
3. #194 - Nyjer Morgan (0 points)
4. #218 - Todd Helton (0 points). The other guy who follows me everywhere.
5. #71 - Hunter Pence (0 points). An Angel, National, Rockie and Astro. The excitement level is too high!
6. #343 - Brad Penny (2 points, SP)
7. #223 - Jason Kubel mini. (0 points). Regular back! Just the 4th one so far.
8. #TDH22 - Grady Sizemore, This Date in History (1 point for TDIH, 2 points for favorite player list, 3 points total). Born on the same day of the formal signing of the Declaration of Independence. So we're free to pose naked for our girlfriends. Or for the general public. Yay, freedom!
Pack 16 total: 5 points
Total so far: 115.6 points
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
PACK 17
1. #264 - Captain Nemo (0 points). Fictional submariner.
2. #146 - Carlos Lee (0 points). It's the Carlos Lee box! I'm expecting the silk card any moment.
3. #52 - Gavin Floyd (0 points)
4. #19 - Tommy Hanson (0 points). Nobody named him favorite player? I thought he was Chuck Norris/God. What happened?
5. #273 - David DeJesus (0 points)
6. #AGHS4 - Mariano Rivera, Baseball Sketches (3 points for being sketchy, subtract 1 point for being Yankee. 2 points total). These sketches seem to work slightly better than last year. ... Oh, wait, I just thought of the Andre Ethier one. Never mind.
7. #MM10 - Brachiosaurus (3 points, Monster of Mesozoic). Brachiosaurus apparently was 50 feet tall. Now that's impressive.
8. #TD4 - Lance Berkman, This Date in History. (1 point). He looks like he's wearing an orange jumpsuit.
Pack 17 total: 6 points.
Total so far: 121.6 points
Pulling Midwest players is killing me.
PACK 18
1. #103 - Niccolo Machiavelli (0 points). I'm going out on a limb here, but I would say that Machiavelli wasn't all that interested in finding the good in others.
2. #246 - Geovany Soto (0 points). Better than last year's card.
3. #188 - Jason Bartlett (0 points)
4. #262 - Zack Greinke (0 points). Royals all over the place!
5. #196 - Scott Baker (0 points)
6. #AGHS8 - DeWayne Wise, Baseball Sketches (3 points). This is a cool card. This is the catch that helped save Mark Buehrle's perfect game. Nice one.
7. #LO13 - Prometheus, Lords of Olympus (3 points). When it was time to learn mythology in class, I believe I would emit audible groans. I'll be more than happy to trade this card.
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8. #TDH5 - Chipper Jones, This Date in History (1 point)
Pack 18 total: 7 points
Total so far: 128.6 points
Lots of mediocrity there. At least I've got a hit coming. I hope.
By the way, a few people have mentioned that their A&G box or boxes arrived with damaged cards. I wanted to mention that mine arrived in perfect shape. No complaints.
There's your free ad, Topps. Or Atlanta Sports Cards. Or UPS.
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