Oh, it's you again.
I suppose you've come here thirsty for my knowledge-filled words.
You simple people.
Give me a single reason why I should take a few seconds out of my busy day to amuse your likeness. I am the owner of the two-time Blog of the Year! I have no time for your commoner games. Your mindless musings. Your childish desperation for cardboard pictures. I have heads of state to meet. I have decrees to announce. I have an appointment with Oprah to cry on her show. You are but a ink splotch in my date book.
But because I am a kind and benevolent king, I will allow myself to amuse your unsophisticated sensibilities with something that should be at your speed -- a smattering of cards with no connection other than that they came from a single person.
This person happens to be the same person who so rightly and justly crowned me Blog of the Year once again. And Wes of Jaybarkerfan's Junk was so confident in my winning the Blog of the Year once again, that he sent me cards before the vote was over.
I laugh at the ease at which I reign over all.
I do not know why I bother with your kind.
I could talk a fortnight about how boring you are and how regal I am, but I suppose your brains aren't equipped for such erudite conversation.
Very well then.
Some ridiculous cardboard:
An Awesome Night Card of Juan Castro. Does it dare enter the Night Card Binder? Of course it does. Would you give your Blog King a common night card? That is a rhetorical question, commoner. You be a fool!
A logo-obscured card of Hong-Chih Kuo. Your Blog King laughs at Upper Deck's inability to hide team logos. Any old serf can see the Dodger logo on this. Fie! I say.
An Australian? Did someone send the Blog King a card of a scurrilous debtor? I be very close to throwing someone's entire family into prison.
Much more pleasing to the eye. The golden frame and foil fits my kingly demeanor. And Xavier is a royally deserving name. Yet, Mr. Paul cannot work his craft as well as your Blog King can.
Yay, I know 1971 Topps well. A card set fit for a king. This is deserving of my viewing. Now, fetch me my ale.
Lastly -- because I have finished my time to waste on you -- are two numbered Russell Martin cards from the royally awful Piece of History sets. I will allow these in my collection despite the set's stench, despite Martin's fall from grace as a wretched Yankee and now a scurvy Pirate, and despite a scandalous Twin befouling my cardboard.
I will accept them, but I am growing weary of lowering myself.
In fact, I am weary of this whole exercise.
The two-time Blog of the Year has more important matters to address.
Your majesty has spoken!
Wait, what? These weren't my Blog of the Year prizes? These were simply Jaybarkerfan Junk's PWE giveaway thingy?
Well, that's cool.
Guess that means I'm getting more cards!
I think someone needs to crown Jaybarkerfan's Junk king.